It's 3 in the afternoon here.
Just done reading all the poems posted
And got enough time to review some works.
It's been an hour since I got here.
Just sitting, staring at my computer.
I wanted to write a poem
But I can't think of anything to write
Not that I don’t have anything to write
But because I don’t know where to start
Not that I don’t know how to start
But because lot of things are on my mind.
Things seem to be not getting any better for me.
I don’t know what's so wrong with me!
I had a lot of thinking yesterday
I tried not to think of anything
But I guess I can't control my mind
It's like my mind got its own mind!
Oh well, its sucks! What I feel, sucks!
I started getting like mental depressed yesterday
When my friend made me f_c*ing guess that she had a boyfriend..
He is 24 and she is 49.
The age doesn't bother me so much but god damn it!
My own 49-year-old friend can seem to land a boyfriend!!!..
So what the hell is so wrong with me that I can't??..
I'm in love, All right.
But I love someone who can't love me back!
I've been dumping guys who said they love me
Because of this man I think I can love even if he'll not love me back.
Many times I told myself
That I can. That I will.
But now, what?
Why am I acting like this?
I'm tired……
Not tired of loving him. Coz God knows how long I will love him.
Not tired of waiting for him. Coz I'm not waiting for him (yeah right! Convince yourself girl!)
I don’t know what it is that I'm tired with.
Maybe tired of playing a martyr?
Maybe tired of this kind of set-up I put up?
Maybe tired of thinking that he can't love me?
Maybe tired of thinking that I cant have him?
I have tried absolutely everything.
I have done everything in between
And yet I am still alone. I don't get it!
Why is this happening to me??
What is wrong with me?
I really would like to know what is wrong with me????
Tell me why the f_c* he can't love me!!!

I don't even know what is going on in my own head.
I like to post a poem for today
But I have had a lot of things on my mind.
I have been very depressed
Not really wanting to write much of anything.
I have been too depressed to even write a poem.
Does life ever get any easier to understand?
I can understand some things in my life
But the others seem to come out of absolutely nowhere.
I don’t make sense, huh?
Anyway, I just want to use this space as my place for venting.
Just for today I want to use it as a place for me to get out my sadness.
I hope it's ok with you.